A Note to the Disillusioned Charismatic

When the fire burned you

A Phillip Medhurst Bible illustration of Nadab and Abihu destroyed.

If you’ve walked away from the charismatic church, confused, exhausted, maybe even angry, you’re not alone. And you’re not crazy.

For many believers, the place that once promised power, healing, and spiritual depth became a stage for manipulation, ego, and emotional burnout. Maybe you were prophesied over by someone who was exposed as a false prophet. Maybe you were told to have more faith, pray harder, or believe louder, only to be left feeling like it was all your fault when nothing changed. Maybe you started to notice that the platform mattered more than the people.

Here’s the truth: the pain you're feeling now is not confusion, it's clarity. It’s the pain of finally discerning false prophets and apostles for what they are. That ache in your soul is what happens when the fog lifts and you start to see truth where lies once stood.

I am convinced that at the core, much of what masquerades as spiritual authority is driven by people who want to be someone, but build their platforms on the scars of Jesus' back rather than bearing a cross themselves.

The Root Problem Was Lack of Formation

The great failure of the Charismatic church is the absence of spiritual formation of her leaders. Immature discipleship. Shallow roots wrapped in loud language.

In many charismatic spaces, a lack of theological grounding and spiritual formation has been masked by grand promises: "revival," "mantle," "apostolic alignment." But behind those words are often systems that keep people emotionally dependent, doctrinally malnourished, and spiritually fragile.

It’s not new. Jeremiah rebuked prophets who claimed to speak for God but were driven by self-interest (Jer. 23:16-17). Ezekiel exposed leaders who whitewashed walls that were crumbling (Ez. 13:10-12). Jesus warned about wolves in sheep’s clothing who looked anointed but left destruction in their wake (Matt. 7:15).

When everything is framed as a "move of God," you’re told to submit, not question. When a leader becomes untouchable, you’re told to stay loyal, not discerning. And in the absence of formation, people are left chasing experiences instead of being shaped into Christ.

Let’s call it what it is: a failure of discipleship, not the failure of the Spirit.

Holy Spirit Does the Opposite of What You Were Told

Here’s what you need to know: the real Holy Spirit is not like that.

He is the Spirit of Truth (John 16:13), the Comforter (John 14:26), the One who leads us into the image of Christ (2 Cor. 3:18). He produces fruit, not just fire. He draws you into Jesus, not into a frenzy.

Origen, a third-century Church Father, reminded the Church that the Spirit’s fire purifies, not entertains.¹ Gordon Fee wrote that the Spirit is not a force to be wielded but the very presence of God forming Christ within us.²

The Holy Spirit doesn’t create celebrity culture. He cultivates humility. He convicts of sin. He exalts Jesus above all.

And He does not make you special. He makes you a servant.

The Spirit isn’t given so you can build a brand. He’s given so you can carry a cross. His gifts are not badges of status, but tools for service. If your experience taught you that the Holy Spirit elevated some people to untouchable levels of spiritual authority, you were sold a counterfeit.

The real work of the Spirit always brings us lower, toward repentance, toward others, and toward Jesus.

A Healing Way Forward

The gifts of the Spirit are still real, and they still matter. And if God used you in the past, that was real too. Don’t let someone else’s failure make you question the authenticity of how God moved in your life. You don’t need to sound like Bill Johnson or Shawn Boltz.

Remember, the bigger the platform, the grater the temptation to take spiritual shortcuts to stay there. Be content with where God has placed you, knowing He sees and delights in faithfulness.

When you give a word of encouragement, or pray for healing, or sense the Lord’s direction, block every fantasy that the miracle will make you famous. Eliminate every thought that your gift will fix people. The Holy Spirit isn’t using you to prove your worth. He’s leading people to Jesus.

So shift your heart. Don’t seek to impress. Desire instead that people would know Jesus and His love more deeply because of how you served them. The posture is not power, it’s love.

Let the gifts flow from that place, and you will walk in both power and peace—because those gifts are invitations to serve, not to be celebrated.

The real gift is that God continues to shape your heart into something more like His, even as He moves through you. It’s not about the outcome. It’s about the posture. Quiet faithfulness, deep love for Jesus, and a servant’s heart matter more than public results ever will.

What Now?

Use your gifts, yes, but use them like a servant at the feet of the Master, not a celebrity on a stage.

• Return to Jesus, not a style, not a system, but the Person.

• This might be painful but admit to God you were following Christian celebrities instead of Him. He knows you were duped, but we have to admit our part.

• Find a church where fruit matters more than flash and avoid celebrity Christianity like the plague.

• Let yourself be discipled again, slowly and deeply, not into a ministry style but in the full counsel of the Word, church history, and theology.

• Sit in the quiet. Pray without pressure. Let the Word detox your soul.

You may need counseling. You may need time. But you don’t need to stay stuck in disillusionment.

Say it with me: I won’t confuse what hurt me with who heals me.

You Still Belong

Jesus hasn’t changed. The Spirit hasn’t left. And there is still a place for you in the Church, even if it looks different now.

There’s a quieter, deeper fire still burning. And it was never meant to entertain you. It was meant to transform you.

Welcome back.

1. Origen, Homilies on Leviticus, trans. Gary Wayne Barkley (Washington, D.C.: Catholic University of America Press, 1990), Homily 1.

2. Gordon D. Fee, God’s Empowering Presence: The Holy Spirit in the Letters of Paul (Peabody, MA: Hendrickson Publishers, 1994), 16.